I'm late, I'm late! For a very important date!
A.k.a. The story of my life I've done this thing, ever since I was in elementary school, where I never show up on time. And I mean NEVER . Anyone who knows me personally is probably like no shit. My boyfriend did this thing for a while where he would tell me an event started 15-20 minutes earlier than it actually was scheduled just so I would show up kind of on time. I'm late for work, late for meals, late for dates (sorry, boo!), late for movies, late to parties, I go to sleep late, and of course I always, always, always wake up late. Me and my Ma at my 1st birthday party. We probably showed up late. I think this all started back in elementary school. I lived out of district so my mom had to drive me there every morning. When I say we lived out of district, I mean we lived practically on the other side of town. We were late to school every damn day. The lady in the office would ask me why I was late so she could write me a tardy slip. Most of time I made things up,...